Me Talk of CG Garfield gave me malignent cancer

Cactus Benign tumor: Hey bro. Don't mind me. I'm just growing here and being a dick. I won't kill you, but boy am I annoying as shit. Hey, you got some extra chips?

Me ^I would watch a show about this

Cactus Everyone Loves Benny

Me And the twist right at the end of season 9 is that Benny is actually a traveling comedian that got himself surgically grafted to you one night while you were drunk and has had a hidden camera crew following you around making 9 seasons of a reality TV show

Übertreiber what the fuck am I returning to?

Me =D

Merf cancer

Cactus This show will literally give you cancer

Übertreiber This show will grow on you!

Me Damn I wanna actualyl have this show be real. I reckon that'd be great

Me Sam and Benny the Benign Tumor!

Me I have no idea why I chose sam

Übertreiber *sings* "He's an unemployed web designer"

Übertreiber "He's a benign tumor"

Übertreiber "together they're unstoppable!"

Übertreiber "Saaaaam and Benny!"

Cactus Out at a bar, they check out some ladies.

Cactus Benny: *whistles* See that one over there? Definitely a 4.

Cactus Sam: IIII dunno, she's more of a 7.

Cactus Benny: No, 4 as in stage 4 cancer. Mole on her cheek. She's a goner.

Cactus *laugh track*

Übertreiber *drops off his chair*