Cactus Codex

Pony blogger, actual cactus, artist, writer, computer scientist, and linguist. New Jersey / Pennsylvania | 21 | male, he/him/his | asexual hispanic | Cereus repandus, or Peruvian apple cactus

Why I hate coconuts

sonnivate:

setofu:

We were playing Dungeons and Dragons and coming up to the big finale boss fight. House rules are that three 20s = instant kill.

The party decided to allow their pet sentient cactus to fight along with them after teaching it how to throw and retrieve a coconut. I went along with it for the laughs, treating it as an improvised weapon with pretty large negatives on dice rolls.

The very first round of the fight went to the cactus. The cleric instructed Needles the Cactus to throw his coconut at the boss.

MFW 20

MFW 20 20

MFW 20 20 20

MFW my uberboss was one-shotted with a coconut

MFW I had to think of how a coconut, thrown by a two-foot tall walking cactus, had managed to slay a black dragon.

@post-cactus

@chaotic-conundrums because he’s a DM

conspicuouslad:

datcatwhatcameback:

introvertproblems:

Follow IntrovertProblems For More Posts!

Yellow is usually me. 

Green, purple, and teal for me.

Green, and especially yellow. They go hand in hand in my case.

#Yellow is so presumptious #like if you don’t think they’ll get it #say it so they do #Ur hur I’m an introvert cause I’m smarter than everyone #no you’re just a jackass 

I dunno about that.

Every time I talk, I feel like I convey nothing, or convey some pointless and useless thing that no one could possibly care about.

It’s like I’m not saying anything at all, even if I try my hardest. The others would just look at me for a second, then flat-out ignore me because they’re just so much more interesting and expressive than I could ever be.

Sometimes that’s alright (teal), but sometimes it’s frustrating and exhausting to be trying to join on a conversation only to be seemingly shut down right from the start. So really, what’s the point of trying to say something if no one’s gonna listen or understand?

piratedashmod:

finalskies:

Six years ago today a cartoon show literally no one believed in (not even its own production staff initially), aired for the first time. It was from a franchise the general public had largely written off a long time ago. It was criticized and ridiculed before it ever aired. By all accounts, there was absolutely no reason for this show to be decent, let alone phenomenal

But Lauren Faust sparked a fire that swiftly spread to everyone around her. They poured more passion and hard work into My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic than any outsider would think necessary. 

It became a worldwide phenomenon, inspired millions of artists of all trades, raised hundreds of thousands of dollars for charities, united countless friendships, spread genuine good throughout the globe, and is arguably one of the most culturally significant cartoons of all time.

And they’re really friggin’ cute to boot.

Couldn’t have said it better myself.

(via piratedashmod)

Do you actually like Clinton at all or do you just dislike Trump so much more and don't feel a third party vote is worth it?

Asked by Anonymous

crade-elcin:

post-cactus:

A mix of both.

Really, I feel like people are too easily falling for the idea that Clinton is some evil she-witch who is just as slimy as Trump.

That’s isn’t to say that she’s not imperfect, though. Even she wasn’t my first choice and I’ve always commented on how disconnected she seems with a younger audience, and how questionable her actions of late have been.

But she’s no Trump, and that is good enough for me.

As for third parties, it really isn’t worth it. Neither the Greens or Libertarians have a remote chance of winning, and all they’ll do is sap votes away from the Republicans and Democrats, potentially spoiling the election.

Seriously. Don’t do that.

voting for third parties is not worth it, because they won’t win anyways? what kind of backwards logic is that? you should encourage EVERYBODY to vote a third party, otherwise you’ll never get rid of the two party system, ever!

you can only get rid of this notion, that “only republicans or democrats matter”, when you finally stop pretending that only republicans or democrats matter.

We will never get rid of our two-party system. Not under our current system, that is.

Let’s imagine an election for a congressman in some district. There are four candidates: Red, Blue, Green, and Yellow. They are all competing for one seat in Congress.

Red and Blue are the biggest parties and have platforms designed to attract as many voters as they can, with Green and Yellow trailing.

You are a Green supporter. But with the current polls and despite your best efforts, not enough people support the Greens for them to make a clear plurality. Reds and Blues are simply too stubborn to switch over, or don’t care.

What do you do? Well, you hate the Blues, as they are the most unlike the Greens. And some of what Red is offering aligns with your beliefs. So fuck it, vote for Red.

That’s the problem. There’s only one seat for you to vote on, so it’s advantageous to vote for the big party that aligns best with your ideas. You only need the most votes out of the four to get a plurality and win.

And this happens hundreds of times over as we fill the seats in Congress, voting for each individual congress

But what if you can get a surge in one of the third parties? Like, what if the Blues launch an exodus to Yellow for some reason and they win majorities in a lot of districts?

Well then, congratulations, you got Yellow in the congress. And over time, Yellow will grow in size as they start morphing their platform to attract more voters. Suddenly, we’re back to where we started. Only now, it’s always Red vs. Yellow.

It’s the same shit.

This is Duverger’s Law, and though it’s not prominently documented in every first-past-the-post system in the world, it most certainly is here in the US.

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We’ve had two major parties competing against each other for over 200 years.

So unless we reform and switch to a better electoral system, it will always be this way. And from the looks of it, neither the Democrats or Republicans are looking to introduce competition anytime soon.

adurot:

bennimyau:

artisinmysoul:

catbountry:

intercal:

This is the American Gothic. If you’ve never been to the USA, this image sums it up pretty well.

#I feel like I’ve driven past this before#been exactly here#but at the same time I’m not sure

Same, actually.

I see like 8+ restaurants in one phoTO??? OmG 

Welcome to ‘Merca. Buy our shit or get the FUCK out.

This is directly off an interstate exit, for all those travelers who want food and gas. Next couple of blocks likely has several hotels.

Adding to the above because I 100% recognize this place and it’s somewhat interesting for a road guy like me.

This is exit 161 on the Pennsylvania Turnpike in Breezewood, where I-70 meets I-76 (the turnpike).

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It’s special because here, I-70′s freeway going north suddenly stops and all the traffic is dumped onto US-30 for a short distance before turning back around and merging with I-76.

Literally the best place to open up some rest stop shops!

Interstates are not supposed to use surface roads along their route, much less have things like stores on the side or intersections with traffic signals. It’s rather rare, and this is one of the more famous of the freeway gaps. Another one being the entrance to the Holland Tunnel on the NJ side (I-78).

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Funfact: The gap can obviously be fixed, but business owners in Breezewood would prefer not to lose all those potential customers literally driving to their doorstep. Thus, the gap remains. Murica!

Back Yard Archeology

whimsymorning:

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I was out in my back yard this weekend, just doing some yard work when something suddenly caught my eye.

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Wait. Is that…?

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Yes. Yes it is. So I just had to dig it up.

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Wow, this pony’s looking rough. How long has it been here? 

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I’ve heard of earth ponies, but this is ridiculous! But can we clean her off enough to determine who this mare is?

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So, strangely, most of her body seems to be encased in duct tape? Was there a line of toys like that, or was she shielding herself before trying to burrow to the center of Equestria?

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Oh. It’s Applejack. That was honestly my first guess.

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(via ambris)